AITAH for threatening to divorce my wife if she didn’t become a proper homemaker in the next month?

My wife and I have been married for four years. I’m 33 and male, and she’s 32. Her name is Steph.

Steph is a SAHW, and since we got married, she has been incredibly inconsistent with household labor. I work a physically-demanding job, and it would really help if Steph could at least cook dinner more than once or twice a week. Instead, she sits at the dinner table, hunched over her phone for hours a day. She’s completely addicted to it, but she refuses to even have a conversation about this.

Now, about twice a year, I have an opportunity to visit a foreign country for work. The nature of the work is to supervise construction and instruct the workers there. The compensation for these trips is always fantastic, and Steph is appreciative when I go because I bring home a pretty fat paycheck after.

Three weeks ago, I was about to depart for two weeks on such a trip. At around 10am, I texted Steph and said that time was tight, but I’d be home at 12:30 to pick up my luggage. I asked her if she would make me something for lunch and she agreed to do so. I emphasized that I had about ten minutes to stuff my face and then get to the airport.

At 11am, I texted her again, saying I’d be home as planned at 12:30. Again, she said “OK.”

At 12pm, I texted her saying that I was leaving. I walked in the door at exactly 12:30, only to find her sitting at the dinner table, hunched over her phone. When I walked in, she gave me this bewildered look.

She had done literally nothing. Nothing was cooking.

Steph stood up in a panic and said she’d start making me lunch, but I told her that it was pointless. She sheepishly apologized, and I responded, “Don’t say sorry. Just be less fucking useless.” This made her very upset. I just picked up my luggage, left, and went to the airport. I did manage to pick up some food at the airport, but I really would have liked a home-cooked meal before eating out every day for two weeks.

I got home last week, and Steph was still angry. She said that what I said to her was over the top. I asked what she had been doing those two weeks, and she insisted that she was “super busy” (see: Instagram and Netflix).

I gave her an ultimatum: that she had one month, until 1/10, to get her shit together and be a proper homemaker. I told her that if she couldn’t, I was going to divorce her. Steph was super upset, and for the past week, she has been sulking (see: Instagram and Netflix). She told her family about it, and her mother basically blamed me for Steph’s lack of direction in life.

I know it’s nonsense that a 32-year-old woman needs to have her hand held to do anything, but was I being ridiculous with my ultimatum?