AITAH for crying when my boyfriend let his best friend’s wife alter the dish I made for dinner?

Throwaway account

My boyfriend (28M) and I (22F) met at work two years ago. Technically I was working part-time during undergrad and he was a customer, but after a couple of months, we started going out. I really love this man and nothing has happened on this scale before, so I’m very confused about it.

My bf has a very tight group of friends. I am well acquainted with them, and their girlfriends. One of them Dave, just is married to Ellie (fake names). Ellie is an excellent cook and often hosts dinners, and everyone brings a dessert to those dinners. I am the youngest in the group, so most times they brush off my requests for contributing or bringing in a dessert. However, the last time I asked Dave and Ellie if they wanted anything extra like wine or some sweet dish for dinner, they said I could bring one of those sweet dishes I make for my boyfriend.

I’m Indian, and even though I can’t cook as well as my mom, and I’m well, in a different country for studies, I called my mom up and had her teach me properly how to make a specific Bengali sweet which is my favourite. I had my friends taste it and they said it was great. My boyfriend ate some and said it was excellent.

Except, last night, I greeted Ellie and kept the dish in the kitchen. When the food was brought out and my boyfriend told everyone I made it, I saw that someone had added cinnamon powder to the sweet. You never have the sweet with cinnamon powder. The dessert tasted like cinnamon and I felt horrible. Though everyone said thank you and it was good, I think my face gave it away, and my boyfriend took me aside and said that Ellie had told him that my sweet looked ‘too white’ and thought some cinnamon might bring some colour into it. I don’t know, I just felt awful and I started to tear up.

My boyfriend then defended Ellie and said that his friends already think I’m a child and not make a big deal of this and we will talk about it. I told him Ellie asked him first, couldn’t he have told her not to add cinnamon to the sweet?

He told me he didn’t think it was a big deal and asked me to drop the topic on the way home.

I didn’t text him goodnight and this morning he said he was sorry and said my crying made him feel like an awful person.

I don’t know, now I think I overreacted. AITA?