AIO: snapping at my gf after funeral so she got Tinder?

So I’d like to wholeheartedly apologise to everyone who just plainly said to break up, I wanted to ignore those comments for genuine feedback to try to salvage the relationship.

I hope this is my last time here and thank you for people who offered me advice and harsh reality, and the condolences. But I believe this was necessary to happen for me to understand what I’m doing. I did try communication yesterday, as many suggested, but it spiralled. (Question, does Tinder really not need verification?)

Now I really don’t feel like I have to ask if i’m overreacting here, I don’t think I am, but is there any way this could actually be excused?? I want to have a peaceful part of my mind to think that maybe she did actually care about us.

I do want to break up, that much is clear to me now, I just don’t know how to go on about it. This was my first relationship and it’s been over two years, idk what I’m trying to achieve here but I guess I’m just hoping that maybe this in some way can be understood because of alcohol? And that maybe deep down she didn’t mean it? Maybe I stressed her out yesterday and she got drunk and Idk.

We had this thing before where she kissed a guy but she said it wasn’t consensual on her part so I didn’t hold that against her, but it happened three times I think. Does that happen often? I genuinely want to know, and I’m sorry if it does. I’m just questioning a lot of things now Ig.

(Also I’m not sure how the age stuff spiralled but we’re both in 20s, although she is older, I don’t want it to come off the wrong way.)