AIO for thinking I need to break up with my gf?

My partner and I have been in a rocky situation for a little bit now. Just arguing over dumb things. One of my biggest issues is that when she is mad, she is extremely mean. Especially when she’s mad and has been drinking. This happened last night.

For context I have been watching her animals for the last 4 days while she’s on a family trip. My brother passed a little over a year ago. He was killed by a drunk driver. I am very much still in the grief process and I might always be. I had gotten something shipped that was made from a memorial we did and there was also an article recently released about him so I was going through it at the time she called. Literally sitting crying, just grieving and letting it happen as my therapist says I should do and let happen when it comes.

I texted her saying I wasn’t in a good mood (the first screenshot) and don’t want to talk rn and then all this ^ happened. She called so many times demanding I answer. She claims it’s my fault because I couldn’t answer a phone and was ignoring it. The screenshots aren’t the entire conversation but you can get the concept from them.

This behavior is extremely alarming to me. While it’s not frequent it has happened before to this level a few times or so.

This morning she texted me expecting me to apologize again? I apologized last night saying I could have communicated better (she took my text as I don’t wanna talk at all when in reality I just needed a moment to gather myself and grieve). After I asked, she gave a half ass apology about how she treated me/what she said and said that none of that was true which I don’t believe since she repeated herself over and over.

She is still saying if I would have just answered the phone, none of this would have happened. Is that true, AIO? (I wrote 1 and 10 on there to know what order to put these in)